Archive for the ‘Personal’ Category

I am going to start with Bella’s story because I didn’t have a blog then and I want to make sure it is recorded somewhere as it was just as beautiful and special as Libby’s. It is a bittersweet birth story. We had some friends pray for us the night that I gave birth to her that she would come soon (2 weeks before 40 weeks) but I didn’t think that it would happen THAT NIGHT! So as we were driving home that night Daniel told me a joke to this day I wish I could remember what it was but I don’t. And I thought that I had peed but I couldn’t stop so embarrassed and not sure what was going on I told Daniel and asked him to pull over. We called the doctor’s office and sure enough my water had broken! So It was about 10pm we go to the hospital and they put me on pitocin since my water broke. It made me really loopy I was saying things like “tell the purple horse that the blue horse isn’t coming” or something equally as strange! Around 4am they realized that she was breech and they were going to have to do a c-section since my water broke. I was so sad as I had not mentally prepared myself that was what was going to happen. BUT God was so awesome in that Daniel came into the surgery room with me and sang a worship song with me as they were doing the procedure. It was such a beautiful holy moment! And when I saw her for the first time tears flooded my eyes I was overwhelmed with this tiny amazing baby that was ours! It wasn’t what I expected but beautiful the same!

Because of the pain and recovery from the surgery. I had BAD post pardum depression that lasted a long time in fact the doctor diagnosed me with double depression. Meaning I had depression all my life then I had post pardum ontop of that! I ended up getting on medication for a couple years that helped me process my emotions and deal with some deeper issues. It had NOTHING to do with the bright joy of Bella! In fact she is what brings me joy on a daily basis and if it weren’t for her silliness, love and happiness I don’t think I would be the person I am today! Also I went to a prayer service one night about a year ago (against my will and totally closed off thinking this guy was a hoax and nothing would happen) and the main guy prayed for me and SERIOUSLY felt like a fog lifted and I could laugh again! I am so thankful that I walked both paths! For the longest time (well all my life) I dealt with depression but nothing worked and people around me didn’t “believe in” medicine so I can’t tell you how many times I had people pray for me and walked away feeling the same. I finally came to a place where I needed to try something else after all insanity is trying the same thing over and over and expecting different results. So I went on medicine and now I honestly understand and sympathize with those who have to be on medication all their lives. It is a HARD path! But then when I had my “cloud lifted” after the prayer from the traveling preacher I now also believe that God does and can heal us as well sometimes he wants us to walk both paths like I did.

So then when I was pregnant with Libby I was nervous to have a c-section again as it caused so much pain, a long recovery and bad post pardum! So I looked into v-bac and talked to my doctor about it along the way. She was very supportive! I loved her!! I cried with her and laughed with her! If you are looking for a good Ob/GYN check out Sonya Yoo with Austin Reginal clinic! AMAZING! So since Bella was 2 weeks earlier and we weren’t prepared I prepared a month out JUST TO BE SAFE so we wouldn’t forget anything. But then it was past the 39 week mark and I was sooooooooo ready for her to come to the point of people would say “she needs to cook longer” or “she isn’t coming today” and it would make me mad . So one day we went to the park with my parents and walked around a lot and ate ice cream. My mom said “you can walk faster than that” I replied “oh yeah?! I bet I could beat you almost 9 months pregnant” so the race was on. She CHEATED and cut through the middle of the circle so I RAN to beat her. Then later that night we went home and Bella was doing these silly dances that were on PBSkids.org and we joined in for like 15 min. THEN because laughter caused Bella to come Daniel and I rented several funny movies and watched them, still nothing. THEN in the middle of the night I woke up to use the bathroom and felt the bed and there was fluid!! So we went to the doctor and my water had broken! The story continues throughout the photos (set the camera on auto and gave the camera to my hubs pics came out pretty good, thanks sweetie!)….

my little gnome head!

I didn’t have any medicine for the first hour or two but then it started to get painful so I asked if there was anything other than an epidural we could do. I was trying so hard to keep from having a repeat c-section. So they did an IV of medicine that would wear off after a half hour and I had to wait a half hour to get more. It was the WORST pain I have EVER felt! I wasn’t breathing “right” for everyone and they kept telling me how to breath and I wanted to smack them and say “do you have a 7 lb mass passing through you?!” HA HA HA. So It was about 6 hours in and I asked the nurse if it was going to be about the same pain level and she said that I just started. Oh OK, where is an epidural!? As soon as I had it put in I was able to have everyone come in and talk and I was able to relax. Which ended up being GREAT because then I had energy for pushing and to take care of Libby once she came out instead of being a zombie from pain and exhaustion. Then we all waited almost 14 hours altogether and it was time to push.

For some reason I didn’t want to use the stirrups (sp?) so the nurse held my leg up and wanted Daniel to hold the other one. He looked at me like he was going to pass out so I had him go get my Mom. It was such a bonding experience with her! After a little while of pushing with them holding my legs I realized what they were talking about so I had them pull the stirrups out then Daniel was able to stay at my head and my Mom stayed to help with counting and breathing. It was a beautiful experience that I was able to go through with it! When she came out I didn’t cry but smiled and was filled with the natural love cocktail that comes from having a baby come “naturally”. It was AMAZING to not have the excruciating pain as I did with the c-section!

She came out “floppy” and there was something wrong with her cord so they had to run a lot of tests. But in about an hour she snapped out of it and was perfectly fine! While the doctor was sewing me up I asked about my c-section scar. He said it was strong and nothing went wrong with it. I asked him if he thought it would be ok to have another baby then. He looked at me and laughed “Either you are strong or crazy because I haven’t even finished sewing you up and you are talking about having another baby!?” HA HA I think I am both!  A couple weeks later we found out that she has Torticollis in her neck from being head down for so long. We are doing physical therapy and she is responding really well to it! Otherwise she is a PERFECTLY healthy and beautiful baby! This little baby has brought so much joy to our family! I love both my girls soooooo much and am so thankful for them!

 Daddy kisses!

sisters!

 Daddy got to hold her first!

You think her mommy is a photographer!?

Nana

Grandpa

Auntie, cousin, Papa and Sister

Grandma

I got these for Daniel as at the last hospital we stayed it was sooooooo cold.

Great grandma!

Thanks for sharing in our joy!!